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徵求修改英文看圖寫作(3篇)致贈20點. 發問者： 小卉 ( 實習生 3 級)
擅長領域： 升學考試 | 台灣
發問時間： 2008-12-21 17:44:02
解決時間： 2008-12-22 17:49:11
解答贈點： 20 ( 共有 0 人贊助 )
回答： 1 評論： 0 意見： 0
[ 檢舉 ]
網友正面評價
71%
.共有 7 人評價.國一學生班際比賽看圖寫作練習用,請各位達人就寫作本身提供修改意見,謝謝!(由於字數限制,第三篇用補充的方式提供)
一. Every week this family always goes to the mall to buy the supplies. They often buy shirts, foods, electricity’s products and many things. But have a time when they want to go home, his father’s car was been moved away. So they just wait in front of the supermarket. They wait for a long time, and suddenly a truck pass through them, they ask them can they sit in their car? And that driver was very kind and they went in.
When they came home; they think they want to send gifts to the driver, because he is very kind. Another week they take the market and meet that driver and send the gifts for him.
A long time, they did not meet the driver, but they did not know that the driver was died in an accent. They are very dejection about it.
二. Tomorrow will be David’s birthday. So his father cleans his car today because he wants to drive outside with David. Also his mother goes to the market to buy the stuffs of the birthday cake.
Next day, when David wake up, he feels all amazing. His house just like change. And his parents plan many things let him to play, tell him today is your birthday, Have Fun! They take him to many place to play lots of games.
In afternoon, his parents take him to go to a restaurant to have the dinner. When they done the dinner, they go home to sleep. But when he wake up, it just a dream.
2008-12-21 17:47:43 補充
三.One day, Joan’s father and brother want to teach her how to ride a bicycle. First, her father and brother are very patient to teach her, when they teach hardly but Joan still can not learn it. She falls down the bicycle many times. So they change their mind not today to teach her.
2008-12-21 17:48:50 補充
續Second day, they put two wheels by the two sides of the bicycle. And tell her: “Be careful”. And then, she went on it. She rides very well in four wheel bicycle. So her father and brother take off the wheel.
2008-12-21 17:49:12 補充
續The third day, Joan went on the two wheel bicycle, she said:” I can ride!” they are all very happy about that. So they ride the bicycle out to celebrate.
最佳解答發問者自選
.. 回答者： cavalier ( 專家 1 級 )
代表知識團： 英格麗續
擅長領域： 英文 | 麻將
回答時間： 2008-12-21 21:33:56
[ 檢舉 ] .
茲建議修改如下:
一. Every week this family go to the mall for shopping. They often buy shirts, foodstuff, electrical appliances and many other things. There was a time when they wanted to go home, they found his father's car was towed away. So they just waited in front of the supermarket for a long time before a truck passed by them, and they asked the driver if they could take a ride. And the truck driver was kind enough to allow them on board.
When they came home, they considered they should send a gift to the driver because he was very kind. Another week they met that driver again at the same mall, and sent the gift to him.
For a long time, they did not meet the driver any longer, because they did not know that the driver had died in an accident. They were very sad about it.
建議: 注意時態的運用以及語意的正確表達.
二. Tomorrow will be(可用is) David's birthday, so his father has his car washed today because he wants to drive outside with David. Also his mother goes to the market to buy birthday cake and many other stuffs. Next day, when David wakes up, he feels much amazed because his house looks just like changed. And his parents have planned many things for him to enjoy, and tell him, "Today is your birthday, have fun!" They take him to many places to play lots of games.
In the afternoon, his parents take him to a restaurant for the dinner. When they finish the dinner, they go home to sleep. But when he wakes up, he finds everything is just a dream.
建議: 全篇採用現在式敘述, 就應維持時態的一致.
三. One day, Joan's father and brother want to teach her how to ride a bicycle. They are very patient to teach her; however, no matter how hard they do, Joan still cannot learn it. She falls down from the bicycle many times. So they change their mind and decide not to continue teaching her today.
The next day, they put two wheels by the two sides of the bicycle and tell her, "Be careful!". And then, she rides on it. She rides very well this four-wheel bicycle. So her father and brother take off the side-wheels.
參考資料
自己; 英文文法 2008-12-21 21:34:38 補充
The third day, when Joan gets on the two-wheel bicycle, she says: "I can ride!” they are all very happy about that. So they ride the bicycle out to celebrate.
建議: 注意維持時態的一致以及語意的連貫性.
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car,birthday cake,dinner,David,truck,market,mother,David wake,very kind,supermarket[ 快速連結 ] 其它回答( 0 ) | 意見( 0 ) | 評論( 0 )
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